Welcome to the Facts!

Well I never thought I would finally get this thing on the web, but it is finally here:

The Facts of Bob's Life website has been born! In Blog form!

It has taken my lazy ass well over two years of planning, organizing, designing and debating, and I decided to just get off my high horse and put the "Facts" out in any way, shape or form.

But wait, asks the uninitiated, what are the Facts of Bob's Life exactly?

Well, says Bob the gentle guide, they are a series of humorous tales (or "Facts" if you will) that chronicle my life in the past, present and quite foreseeable future. The subjects can range anywhere from tortured 80's childhood nostalgia, highbrow political nonsense, bathroom incidents to twisted silverware. All of which are true. So if you're offended by any of this I encourage you to read the rest of the post to make sure if you are or not and then for God's sake stop reading it if you are.

So how did all of this madcappery start?

It all began one day at my work. I was bored out of my mind and I needed a distraction, so I decided to start a project. I had decided that I would send an e-mail to a friend of mine once a day, every day, with the soul purpose of annoying him to the point of madness, or to the point of him walking over to me and hitting me in the back of the head. Each e-mail would contain nothing more than a pointless little tidbit about my life. Something along the lines of "when I was a child I loved PBJ sandwiches, now I don't". Simple, effective, maddening.

Unfortunately this plan did NOT work, and instead my friend loved it. He loved it so much he told others about it and they wanted these e-mails. And then they told their friends, and their friends told their friends, and I bragged about myself and blah blah blah, and it blossomed into this strange daily newsletter that we all loved. I even held a contest with crazy prizes (cat food with q-tips in a ziplock bag. no joke)!

It stopped because of a stupid thing called life, which somehow always gets in the way, and I also wanted to make a website out of the thing. Well life kept getting in the way, and as I mentioned above, after two years of empty promises and failed attempts, there was nothing.

So I gave up and just made a stupid blog type thing. And I hate blogs.

To justify it to myself I see this as a sort of dry-run for the actual website that will someday manifest itself when I wake up one morning.

So it's a Fact: At least this is something, right? Right!